Memoirs of Insignificant Me

Memoirs of Insignificant Me

Tuesday, December 9, 2014

A Cautionary Fairy Tale

I opened my favorite book and tore out a page because it had your name. My mom asked, "what are you you doing?" and by the look on her face I knew I was going to get an earful... But all she said was "foolish, that's your favorite book and you'll never get that page back" and walked away.

I'm the girl that believes in beautiful stories. And when I meet someone with kind eyes and kind words I want to read into every little detail that will later be another chapter in the most inspiring tale I've ever read.

When I flip through the pages of my life I don't remember the cliff hanger, and I don't remember abrupt endings or how the hero disappears.

I remember the beginnings. But yes, all beginnings. Some stories are longer then others and some more painful than others and definitely, one had more love than all others.

So, what is the moral to this very short story? One, my mom is right. I would have never gotten that page back. And two, you don't stop living your own fairytale because someone says they're not real. Just put the page you have ripped out back in your book and title it "A Cautionary Fairy Tale". Turn the page. Next Chapter.

Friday, March 14, 2014

The higher the heel...

I, like most girls, love to wear high heels. I have mastered looking as though I can walk in them, but I am still terrified of wearing them. Every move feels like a Cirque du Soleil balancing act, especially in a 6 inch heel. Every time I slip on a pair of heels I regress to childhood and I feel like an 8 year old playing dress up in my mother's closet. I am always excited to get dolled up, but I learned at an early 22 that Converse sneakers come in plenty of colors and go great with dresses and skirts. Having been in relationships with 5'7 men that tower over 5'5 me, "Chucks" just seemed like the simple solution. I had a photo shoot in Downtown El Paso 4 years ago and my obsession of heels and photography morphed into the scariest day ever. Christian Louboutin and cobblestone streets=death wish. Now don't get me wrong, I was not slippin' and trippin' all over Mills. In fact,  I was able to fake a strut for about 5 hours. I refused to hold on to my cousin that was there to help with wardrobe  because I was surrounded by men. I needed to look like I was as poised and chic as the red sole on my foot. Long story short, the 6 inch heel just reminded me how much easier a sturdy man would have made my day. The stiletto is something I tend to stay away from because I am unapologetically afraid of heights but I recently had the chance to revisit my fear. I have always needed to celebrate my birthdays with girlfriends ever since I was the 12 year old kid throwing a slumber party... Yet Again! In fact, my last Boy/Girl party was my freshman year in high school and that was enough for me. It used to be a preference and now at my age it's just necessary. All my girlfriends refuse to stay single! They are either married, engaged or in a serious relationship. My best guy friend asked me why he wasn't invited to my 30th Birthday Dinner and my response was that he couldn't kick it because he was a boy. If I invited him I would have to let  my girls bring their men and I could not be sitting at a table full of couples and feel like the third wheel at my own birthday dinner! He then offered himself as my "Date" and promised to dote on me as well. He asked me to not be "that girl" and to accept change and my girls' new lives. I accepted the offer and told my friends to invite their significant others. I am not kidding, the first thing I thought to myself was, "I can finally wear that pair of heels that have been sitting in my closet for 3 Years!" My 30th birthday turned out to be one of the best nights ever. I was standing proudly in my six inch heels with my tall "friend-date" and I couldn't have felt more beautiful and confident. I am in no way suggesting  that men=confidence, especially when this perpetually single girl wears heels pretty often. But I am saying that there is some magic in the right pair of shoes, and the right arm to keep your balance on that makes you feel a little more girly than usual.... Cinderella had the right idea all along!

Saturday, March 8, 2014

For My Ladies On International Women's Day!

      First of all, I had no idea that this was an actual holiday! Shame on me, because I even made time to swing by the Krispy Kreme drive-thu for National Donut Day. I have been blessed to have some very strong minded, level headed beautiful women in my life and I wanted to take some time to recognize them. You may be a special lady I'm reffering to so I wanted to let you know what it means to know you and to remind you that young women everywhere don't always need the "Quintessential Hero". Sometimes the only way a young girl will be saved is by meeting a Strong Kind Women.


     Emphasis on Girl due to very childlike tendencies to not play nice. When I started writing this in November I had titled it "Mean Girls" because of a work situation with a female employee who's mission it was to make me look like a little girl in front of my managers as often as possible. I never posted it because I have always told myself that I would not use my blog as a bullying platform. I will, however, touch on the Mean Girl subject for a second. My mother has always said that you can't teach people manners but I now know that I can teach people how to treat me. I will never understand why people in a position to enlighten a young girl would default to the Mean Girl. I am happy to have met this type of women many times in my life. It is because of them that I wake up everyday and tell myself that I don't want to be the most miserable person someone meets today. Looking back to when I was a 20 year old young lady, I realize that guidance is all I needed in a professional environment. There were tear filled phone calls made to my mom from work bathrooms on a daily basis at one point. My mom would tell me how special I was and that I could quit but not until they knew that I would be missed. I thought she was crazy! I now know exactly what she was teaching me. From that point on I would never dismiss myself from a situation and leave my dignity behind. When I leave, it's because I am ready to go and not because I have been "forced" out. Moving along!

     I am happy to report that I meet this type of woman more often than the mean girl. I love singing the praises of women like this! Accomplished, elegant, poised in short the perfect combination of Audrey and Katherine. These women are happy to mentor and teach me the errors of their ways to make my professional life a little easier. Isn't that what trial and error is for? Otherwise mistakes made are just in vain. This is not to say that they do nothing but give you warm fuzzies à la Mary Poppins with a spoon full of sugar. These women aren't faint of heart and play with the big boys. They have not only told me when I am doing something wrong, they immediately show me how to do it right. They've showed me the ropes and don't fear that "this girl will take my job" because they know the only thing I want is the confidence that they embody. There are very few things in life that I find magical but when I meet women like this... I feel like I'm meeting a unicorn! 


     Life has taught me that if you think you are a bad friend then you probably are, sorry! But if your friends are even better friends than you are, (and luckily my, friends are) it is never too late to recover.  I can count my serious-to-die-for-girlfriends on one hand, nope wait I need two! Starting with my cousin that I met when we were only a couples of weeks old to my best friend that I met in high school after stalking her in our high school gym locker room. There are so many times that I annoy myself but they are so accepting of the person that I am and the grown up I sometimes refuse to be. They make me love them even more just letting me be. At one point in our lives we were the same kind of girl and today we live polar opposite lives and the only thing that keeps us close is the simple fact that there are beautiful stories that we have penned together in the pages of our lives. That alone is enough to keep our bonds strong. As an adult, it's difficult to embrace the unfamiliar because you're afraid to get burnt. Luckily the new friends I have gained at my age are blessings as well. 


     I can write a novel about these epic creatures but I won't (at least not today). Mothers amaze me because it's something I have not done, as of yet, but to watch you ladies is so fascinating. Including my own mother of course. Mothers of daughters that remind their girls to be the best version of themselves to be strong but not offensive, and to say no and mean it and most importantly, self love. Mamas, never stop talking your little girls ears off with your words of wisdom. When you aren't around it's the only voice she'll hear.

     Finally, I just really want to say "thank you" to the women that I have been blessed to cross paths with and even the women that have crossed me. All life experiences are lessons learned and the people we meet and keep are our teachers. I pray that I have been of service to my girls. I have so much to learn and am eager to share so keep in touch! XO~Amy Licerio